Yes, You Can: 3 Ways to Begin Your Postpartum Self-Care Routine NOW

In the days and weeks after becoming a mama, the absolute last thing I thought about was myself. During the day, my brain was overwhelmed with thoughts of caring for baby. I need to pump. I need to clean the bottles. I need to wash her clothes. I need to change her diaper. I need to give her a bath. At night, there was still no rest. I have to create (and stick to) a bedtime routine. I need to pump. I have to nurse. I need to watch her to make sure she’s breathing. I don’t need to sleep in my bed, I can sit right here on this couch in the nursery and watch her sleep [insert smiling through discomfort emoji here].

I gave myself zero breaks. I figured I would get back to my self-care when things got easier. Well, I learned very quickly, after a talk with my doula at exactly 3 weeks postpartum, that it didn’t get “easier,” we get better. But, we can’t get better if we aren’t filing the cup from which we pour. I always knew, theoretically, that I couldn’t do for others if I was not doing for myself but, this time, I was watching it play out, right in front of my eyes. I gave and gave and gave of myself and, at the end of a day, I could barely keep myself awake or alert enough to make it through dinner with my family. I’d muster just enough energy to slowly bring food to my mouth one fork-full at a time then slip away from the table and into bed before I had to wake for baby’s first nighttime feed. I was operating on empty.

I’d become a “mombie”. After very little rest for 3 weeks. I, exhaustedly, made the promise to myself that I wouldn’t stress myself out with thinking about “how” I was going to weave self-care into my days (ugh, I’m such a planner). I would just do it. Period. I’d decided that my care didn’t have to be grand, it didn’t have to take a long time, it didn’t have to cost me money— it just had to happen.

How would it just happen? Well, initially I had to set reminders on my phone and in my calendar. Eventually, I’d come to realize that remembering to practice self-care was as simple as considering myself. So, I promised myself that I would begin to keep my self on my mind; the same way that I kept my family, baby and other priorities top-of-mind -and- set the stage for regular self-care.

Here’s how…

3 Ways to Begin Your Postpartum Self-Care Routine Now

1. Give yourself permission to let go. - This may be the hardest part. As a new mama, it can feel “off” to do anything for yourself because you often feel like there’s something you could be doing for baby instead. One way to give yourself permission is to reframe your thinking around taking the time you need for yourself. “You aren’t saying no to your baby’s needs by saying yes to your own. You’re saying, we both have needs to be met and mine are important also.” - Kelly Newsome Georges [ Self-Care Coach for Moms]

2. Plan it. Then, let it be organic.- Overthinking about when and how we’ll care for ourselves can make self-care exhausting. Honestly, it’s one of the reasons why I neglected it for so long. I couldn’t summon the energy to even think about what I’d do to care for me. That said, I now plan nothing but the time. I schedule two time blocks for self-care per week. They’re plugged into my calendar like anything else I have to do and, when the time comes, I choose what I need in the moment. Sometimes I read, other times I go for a drive, and, there are times when I sit down with baby and watch my favorite tv show while cuddling. All that matters is that the care happens.

3. It’s okay to practice with a plus one. - Let’s be real here. As a new mom, alone time is scarce which makes finding solo self-care time a challenge. I used to think that the only way to practice self care was to get alone and do all types of deep, restorative work. Not true. There are days when I’ve meditated with baby on my lap, taken a hot shower with her hanging out in the bathroom with her favorite toys or taken a long, scenic drive while listening to an audiobook with little mama right in the back seat. The key is that I am taking the (sometimes tiny) moments to rest and reset.

Mamas, I hope this encourages you to take the time you need. Remember, it doesn’t have to be grand, it just has to be done. Want to continue this conversation? Let’s chat! Comment below or shoot me a message by clicking the envelope in the top menu.